Newspaper Headlines

Newspaper Headlines


Dan: Luis, I understand today you took some plain,
ordinary paper and turned into
your very own newspaper. Luis: Yes. Dan: What is the headline
on your newspaper today? Luis: Math is fun,
if you do it on computers. Dan: [chuckles] Wait a second. Did you say the headline is,
“Math is fun (comma), if you do it on computers?” Luis: Yes.
– [Dan laughs] Dan: It’s so true, isn’t it? We interrupt this broadcast. My name is Dan Wardell
and my friend Michela is here. What is the headline
of today’s paper? Michela: Giant sea monster
comes out of sea and attacks. Dan: What? Every building in the world
comes to life and burps. Dan: Burps? The national anthem
is being sung by cats. Dan: What’s that? The national anthem
was sung by cats? – Yes.
Dan:Say it ain’t so! Michela: There are alien librarians. Dan: [whispers] Did you say
there are alien librarians? Michela: Yes. Dan: [whispers] Keep your voice
down, they might hear us. It sounds like some heavy
investigative reporting. Is there anything else your newspaper
has reported on today? – Yes.
Dan: What’s that? Teachers in school are
turning into 3-headed robots and burying kids in homework. Dan: Whew, there’s a lot
going on there.

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