Physical Education

Physical Education


I don’t know if any of you guys had to do this in High School, but in my High School, you had to take a Physical Education credit to graduate. So normally, to get it out of the way, in 9th Grade, all the boys would take P.E. and all the girls would take dance. But sometimes though, really white boys would take dance. And you’d always point them out during dance recitals. So I actually took P.E. my sophomore year because I went to a preparatory school in 9th grade. But that was okay, because I fit in quite perfectly with all the other skinny white boys. And there’s like this long moment in the first 10 minutes of class, where all you do is sit in the locker room and wait until coach says, “OKAY LET’S DO THIS!” So one day, we all got bored and just flicking water bottle caps. You know, just the caps in a little… WA-PA! We just started flicking, you know? Like little tiny frisbees. We took caps from the trash, and we would just… WIP-POO! Shoot them at each other, you know? WA-POW! And it was all fun, you know? And no one really got hurt. And I’m petty sure I’m the one who started it, but whatever. And then when we did our physical education class, it was, like, extra hard. Like we ran two laps instead of one. And we had to do wall sits while holding medicine balls. And then afterwards, when we were all sweaty and tired, the teacher goes, “You want to know why today was extra hard? It’s because you’re flicking water bottle caps at each other.” WHAT? Fast forward a couple… I don’t know, a month, and these two kids get the idea to play a game called Bodies. And if you aren’t familiar with that game, it’s a game where you punch someone… …that’s it. You’re not allowed to hit their face though, just their bodies. Which is why it’s called Bodies! And you think at least one of us would be like, “Um, hey you guys-” Oh wait, their voices should be squeaky. “UM, HEY YOU GUYS. COACH DIDN’T LIKE THAT WE WERE THROWING WATER BOTTLE CAPS BEFORE. UH… MAYBE WE SHOULDN’T DO THIS.” So, you know, I obviously couldn’t let that happen… …without watching. And these two kids started playing, and one kid, isn’t even punching back. Which is a strategy I would not use, playing that particular game. And then all of a sudden, the dude taking the punches, falls off his feet, and hits his head on the hard tile, and dosen’t get up. “Did I win?” So were a couple of young bros, and we were like, Hey bro, Bro! BRO! BRO? So we had to tell the teacher, and the teacher got the nurse, and little time passed, and at that point he did wake up a little. And the coach asked him, “What happened?” And he knew he would get in trouble if he told the truth. So he lied and said, “Oh… I don’t know? I just… passed out… …and got all these punch marks.” Although it is possible he could have legitimately forgot. And then the coach asked the class, “What happened?” And everyone was like, “Oh, yea, jeez man, yea. He just passed out.” “Yeah, I saw him. He just flopped down.” And we almost got away with it, except ONE KID, I forget his first name, but his last name was like, Ferilikins or something. UGH, and he had this stupidest bowl cut too. UGH, SO STUPID! He tells the coach, “THEY WERE PLAY-” *Coughs* “They were playing Bodies, And person A Falcon Punched person B.” And THEN, we already KNOW we’re in a whole heck of a trouble. But the nurse called the PE teacher and said, “This kid needs to get his stuff.” And coach said to the class, “Someone needs to get this kid his stuff.” “I- I GOT IT! I’ll get his stuff.” And I’m told that the class had to do lunges down the track field, but I wouldn’t know, because I took my sweet time getting him his stuff. And then a year later I heard our P.E. teacher got fired. For separate reasons.

100 thoughts on “Physical Education

  1. Pe teachers are below janitors because without janitors people would get sick with out gym teachers the schools would have $30k-31k for literally anything else

  2. I used to be able to get out of PE last year because of this one girl in my class, but now she’s gone, I gotta give it a try

    So I had a word with the teacher and now I’m able to get changed in a separate room, which is ok

    PE sucks

    And so does asthma

  3. Girls locker room : jungle
    Boys locker room : a bunch of urangotangs

    Girls + boys locker room : ww3 is about to begin

    News : nuklear bomb exploded at a school yesterday

  4. We had to do an obstacle course for the presidential fitness test and one year they expected us to do a forward roll but I'm fat and they didn't bother to teach us how to do the roll so everbody else could do it for some reason but not me. Idk, maybe I was sick the day they were teaching it.

  5. My first day of PE today 9/6/19 I had a bloody nose with 2 other classes and every one was staring at me I asked the kids next to me for a tissue and the short kid was like imma tell him I was like yes please I was putting my hands together so the lines would connect and put that in my face so it would make sure it would not drip down and we were sitting on the floor so then he told him he said come here and don’t ask when something like that happens and also the first thing MR.GOBLIN said is did u get any blood on my floor and I said what he said forget it and when I came back from the gym my bag was on top of the 3 drops of blood and we had like 120 kids in the gym I think and after the same day I sat on gum

  6. My middle school principal skipped town because he was a pedophile and got caught. Well, I guess not really "caught", but he was facing charges and they found child pornography in his home. I don't think they found him yet. I'll check. This was back in 2012 I think.

  7. Hmm… does anyone want to be the kid that got punched? Kinda surprised no one spoke up about that part where the kid didn't retaliate and just got beaten one-sidedly

  8. My sister is older than me (11 and i’m 10) and she can only do 1 push-up and I can do 40 in 1 min. I’m just trying to say that she is bad at P.E. lol

  9. My P.E. teacher makes us run a mile on Mondays, 1/3 of a mile on Tuesdays and Wednesdays (we don't have a gym and it's 90 degrees most days here in southern cali) and more stuff like 75 jumping jacks and 100 jumpropes and more stuff like that, but the worst part is that he is SO FAT! I mean he needs more exercise than all 40 students in my class COMBINED! I had him in 6th grade and I have him this year in 8th

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