Triggered by Tumblr

Triggered by Tumblr

Today my friends, we friends we venture into the unknown. Where is it that I’m talking about? Tumblr. I’ve never been on Tumblr, I’ve never known anyone who uses Tumblr but it seems like it’s a really big important website on the internet. I have no idea what to expect frankly; so I’m going in. I don’t have an account, let’s sign up. Jeff Dunham Rules…69, 420 Blaze If that’s taken I will freak, I will freak out! ♬ Random feminist talking on top of spooky audio ♬ ♬ Calm classical music ♬ Alright what am I into? Let’s see here. Parenting, this mom looks like she’s eating this baby. That’s not even like, that’s not parenting that’s cannibalism; that’s wrong, but I’m into that definitely. Funny? Pft YES, Can we please get more prank GIFs please? Can we turn this tumblr into I’m gunna click that. Health and fitness has always interested me personally, you guys should be able to tell that by now. *Psh* Does having a large, voluptuous FUPA … uhm … entitle me to click health and fitness? I think it does. I mean it’s not GOOD health and fitness, but it’s health and fitness none-the-less….uhm…anime. Please. ♬ Calm Classical music ♬ Cute. Ah I love it. How does this represent business? Sims meme of a business man, I mean yeah dude, yes. ♬ High tension music ♬ I think I’m ready to go! I think I’m ready to tumble! Come with me guys, on this journey together, lets get tumbled! ♬ Elevator music ♬ Building your dashboard. Ooohhh, I’m excited guys, my first time on Tumblr! Let’s see here… ♬ Calm Classical music ♬ Okay so they’ve generated a dashboard for me, I would like to see what have they generated. Let’s see. “STAY MOTIVATED AND MAKE IT HAPPEN. SHOCK EVERYONE!” SHOCK THEM DUDE. Give your grandpa a heart attack. Become so successful, that the next time that your elders see you they will drop dead from a heart attack. SHOCK them. *pft* Hell yeah dawg, I like this one. I don’t know why about this one, but I definitely like it a lot. Like this one really speaks to me. And I’m gunna gi..I’m gunna like this..I’m gunna give this one a heart. Tumblr’s dope dude. K I’m feelin’ this, definitely. Some young fuckin’ butt dude, showin’ his thing, loving that. WHY is this guy everywhere? I get it YOU’VE GOT ABS. I mean why is everyone on tumblr chippin’ on about this guy? I’ve got abs. What? You don’t see my on the front page of Tumblr all the time? Like what is this not good enough for the front page of Tumblr? I don’t understand why everyone’s got to lose their mind over this guy just because he did a couple of fucking situps, I checked fitness and health, by the way, on my Tumblr … interests, big deal dawg, I mean cool dude, you did some situps. We’re all fucking proud of you. ♬ Electronic Music ♬ Are you SERIOUS? More of this guy, this is like the 10th ga…It’s just about this one guy. COME ON WITH THE ABS DUDE! This is not healthy for my self-perception. I thought Tumblr was all about body acceptance and shit, not getting … I’m .. I’m about to get triggered looking at this fucking guy flashing his abs every time, dude! I’m getting triggered here, dude! ♬ Random feminist talking on top of spooky audio ♬ I have to be honest right now, Tumblr’s kinda triggering me. What is this website? Why do you keep just showing me male models who are jacked? What, is this all Tumblr is? It’s just fucking ripped guys? You know what? Fuck you Tumblr ♬ Electronic Music ♬ You take your body shaming … your body awareness shaming out the door Okay? I’m a big, large beautiful man with a voluptuous FUPA Who DON’T need no woman, and who DEFINITELY don’t need no Tumblr Let’s look up, “FUPA”. No, “Beautiful .. FUPA” That’s … there’s nothing! This website’s so racist, Hila! There’s … all it is, is beautiful perfect male models and when I type, “Beautiful FUPA”, zero FUPA ♬ Calm Classical music ♬ Oh, here I am. I have found myself, finally dawg Found myself under “FUPA” … I guess at least they recognise some beauty when they … hear about it “stroking out one stablised” (laughs) That’s actually pretty cool. Somebody stablised my fucking “triggered” This is all FUPA? It’s a bunch of FUPA memes Oh fuck, that is FUPA That is actual FUPA right there boy, that is just Okay Alright, there it is, we found the FUPA guys We found the FUPA load 😉 here boys, maybe it’s time to move on to a different topic huh? It’s, ah DJ Khaled’s tagged under “FUPA” “These will be for sale very soon, online” Two words: Nice one, Khaled “Super FUPA”. That’s dope, we’re like taking over the “FUPA” keyword WHAT THE HELL IS THIS? That underwater FUPAmobile It’s a FUPAmobile underwater! Ohhh man, there’s a lot of FUPA here Kinda more FUPA than I bargained for, if I’m being honest Maybe I should’ve stuck with the six-pack male model abs … on the homepage ♬ Random feminist talking on top of spooky audio ♬ ♬ Calm Classical music ♬ That is not FUPA. You know what, this has no place on the FUPA page. Can I report this? Like this is fucking bullshit, dude ♬ Random feminist talking on top of spooky audio ♬ I feel like I’m on the edge of having a stroke here from getting triggered so frequently on Tumblr You know, I feel I’ve done enough exploring on FUPA. I’ve been triggered about 20 times and I think for my health maybe we better change the topic … let’s type H3H3 ♬ Calm Classical music ♬ That’s dope, that’s pretty fresh, pretty hip-hop, pretty dope ‘preciate that. Awe. I’m gonna miss Franky boy when we move back to LA. This definitely makes me wanna go back to the days when I used to be hot and sexy, dude Dude … I’ve got such a shimmer in my eye! Such a sweet, young man! Boy, that one really brought the like greasy, jew-y meme inside of me. I can feel the Morty coming off there This … is actually one of the coolest things I’ve ever seen. “The beanie that keeps growing.” and frankly, if you guys wanna know where we are on the beanie game I mean so far, this is the biggest one I have found So this is the Beanie King for those of you who don’t know. It’s definitely far from this which is my destiny, to have a like 50 foot beanie But this is the closest we’ve got, and so far it’s pretty good. DAYUM, BOY! Is this fucking gay fetish porn, or is this Tumblr? Man I didn’t know Tumblr had porn on it.. DAMNNN That is fucking thicc, Hila, how’d you score an ass like that, dude? That’s sick, that’s definitely the best female Ethan cosplay Vʌ I’ve ever seen That is on point, girl. Hell yeah, dude. “when mom walks in on you” [fake laugh] I get it, like I jerk off to Khaled porn, really Like I jerk off to watching Khaled’s beautiful FUPA fold smashing and slam dunking his wife Like I sit there in a hazmat suit and just jerk off in there. Yeah, right(!) I definitely don’t do that, ever. Definitely, I’ve never jerked off to DJ Khaled. Please. Never. ♬ Calm Classical music ♬ Woo-hoo! WHAT? This is like the Keemstar, H3H3 … gnomestar’s best friend, Ethan Holy Shit Nice neck FUPA there, very nice Wow, I’m a big fat chubby gnome in this one, boy DAMN that’s so good The lil’ undie peek? If you guys at male fashion y’know, care about your fashion, and you wanna attract the opposite sex The undie peek is honestly one of the most potent moves you can do If you can just ride your shorts up high enough, and peek the boxers out just enough to entice them to say “hey” – just that little peek, just that sexy lil’ touch just at the bottom of your shorts to say “hey, I am a serious person, but I’m also down to get a little bit weird with you,” If you know what I’m saying. ♬ Calm Classical music ♬ So this one has … 1.7 million loops? Dude I’m fucking famous on Tumblr, that’s dope! ♬ Vine by JONATHAN playing ♬ [laughs] What the fuck? Well I don’t really understand it, but it’s got 1.7 million loops so I guess I’m just gonna accept that as a compliment. Thank you guys, appreciate that Tip of the beanie to you, out there Tumblr Oh wow, H3H3 National Anthem… ♬ “The H3H3 National Anthem” by Mp3Charlie ♬ ♬ Calm Classical music ♬ So hold on, wait, I’m looking up “Ethan” and it’s another guy with a six-pack who’s jacked? Tumblr, what the hell, I’m just trying to look up myself I’ve already got triggered once on your homepage looking at male models, and I can’t even escape… Oh my god, I’m so fucking triggered dude, are you serious? Ethan, no! ♬ Random feminist talking on top of spooky audio ♬ ♬ Sombre classical music ♬ This triggered journey through Tumblr: frankly this was my first time and I’m absolutely disgusted by the body shaming on here. I thought this was a safe place, and I’ve never been triggered so much in my life. Let me know – does Tumblr trigger you guys, like it triggers me? ‘cos I have like a friggin’ … I think I lost some brain cells by shaking my head so hard I just completely stroked out So thank you so much for watching guys, we love ya, we appreciate you, and we will most definitely be seeing you on the next time. ethan theme-songer

100 thoughts on “Triggered by Tumblr

  1. The amount of cringy Kpop fangirls ignoring the ENTIRE vid because of one segment about a Kpop star is disappointing. You guys realize that Kpop and American Pop are the same thing, right?

  2. that triggered noise Ethan plays when he says triggered is gonna make me shit my pants while im playing dark souls 3 and watching this shit

  3. Ive never been on tumbler, but a friend of mine had an ex who was an sjw tumblerette and she was the most miserable human being. I saw here smile maybe 2 or 3 times and actually laugh maybe half as many times. She also used the word triggered in a non ironic way.

  4. I have a tumblr, but I usually stay away from the political nonsense. The only thing I look up is dank memes!!! YEEEAAAHHH BOIIII!!!! 😎

  5. That moment when Ethan doesnt realize all the Korean dudes are different people and not the same person 😂

  6. I sexually Identify as an Attack Helicopter. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of soaring over the oilfields dropping hot sticky loads on disgusting foreigners. People say to me that a person being a helicopter is Impossible and I’m fucking retarded but I don’t care, I’m beautiful. I’m having a plastic surgeon install rotary blades, 30 mm cannons and AMG-114 Hellfire missiles on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me “Apache” and respect my right to kill from above and kill needlessly. If you can’t accept me you’re a heliphobe and need to check your vehicle privilege. Thank you for being so understanding.

  7. I hope you guys are doing well, I’m slowly going into madness from not sleeping for days but these videos have me dyin

  8. What is a Fupa??? I seriously would like to know. On google I saw something with Beyoncé calling it “Fat Upper Pussy Area”, but that can’t be right in this situation, right? I mean, Ethan doesn’t have a pussy. So, what is it?

  9. What the fuck, there's an option to report something if you "don't like it." What kind of police state of a website is tumblr?

  10. someone try the username Anita&ZoeThreesome69 as my username LOL if you don't get flagged for something within at least a week ill buy you a steak dinner

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